Monday, July 31, 2006

PRESENT DAY.

Papi reached the meeting point as per the schedule. One moment he was happy that he was now grown up and need not depend on anyone. The other moment he was worried if this growing up process had in any way separated his friends from him. Papillion was his common name but his friends called him Papi. He looked around to make sure that he was on the exact spot where they were supposed to meet. He still remembered the day when he and his friends, Colia and Mori, decided that they would meet here at the same place after 2 weeks.

TWO WEEKS BEFORE.

Papi and Colia always felt that Mori was the most beautiful creature they had ever laid their eyes upon. Even though Mori had many friends she shared a special relationship with Papi and Colia, her best friends. She decided to share her fears with her friends before they parted for the growing up process. She had a hard time convincing Colia of her fears.

Colia : Oh Common. You are just paranoid. Nothing of that sort happens. Just Relax.

Mori : You don’t understand Colia. I am not like you guys. My Mom always used to say that I am special creature. In my case this is the problem.

Papi:  Hey.What’s up guys? What’s going on?

Colia:  Ah. You are there. Mori is paranoid. She feels that she might not meet us at the reunion. Just put some sense into her.

Papi:  What do you mean not meet us? Come on Mori. The growing up process is very easy. Ok. I will tell you how this works. You visualize this. We are in a stage where we are called as caterpillars. That’s why everyone treats us as kids. In a few days time we will start producing strands of threads from our body. It is called as a Cocoon. So we produce this cocoon as we stay inside the cocoon for 2 weeks. Once you come out of the cocoon we will become beautiful butterflies. With your beauty and the color of the wings you will be the most beautiful creature. What is there to worry.

Mori: Yeah. It is supposed to be as simple as that. But that’s not the case with me. The cocoon I create is a special one. My Mom used to say that humans make silk sarees out of the cocoon that I weave. They let me stay in the cocoon for 2 weeks. I will not be allowed to come out of the cocoon because that might damage it. My mom said that we will be put in hot water so that the cocoon retains its strength.


Colia : Hot water. That would kill us.

Mori : Yes. But they don’t care. My mom said that humans kill 50,000 worms to make one silk saree.

Colia : What is that silk saree?

Mori : That’s a garment the humans wear. The irony is they destroy our cocoon which is a garment to us and create a saree so that they can cover their bodies. However there is one way to be alive. Humans do not kill all of us. They need some creatures to mate and produce more caterpillars like me. If only I can be that lucky one I will be able to meet you at the re-union party.

Papi : Mori don’t worry. Everything’s gonna be alright. Just Pray and I am sure we will have lots of fun after we have our own wings. No one’s going to stop us.

PRESENT DAY.

Papi wished that his statement turn out to be true. Colia had just joined him and they were eagerly waiting for Mori.

Not far away a famous cine actress endorsed an advertising contract for a special silk saree with beautiful butterfly designs on them.

 Sunday, July 23, 2006

Thoughts read during this weekend.

The Six most important words:

“I admit I committed a mistake”

 

The five most important words:

“You did a good job”.

 

The four most important words:

“What is your opinion”?

 

The three most important words:

“Will you please”?

 

The two most important words:

“Thank You”.

 

The least important single word.

“I”.

============================================

1...God won't ask what kind of car you drove;
He'll ask how many people you drove who didn't have transportation.

2... God won't ask the square footage of your house,
He'll ask how many people you welcomed into your home.

3...God won't ask about the clothes you had in your closet,
He'll ask how many you helped to clothe.

4... God won't ask what your highest salary was,
He'll ask if you compromised your character to obtain it.

5...God won't ask what your job title was,
He'll ask if you performed your job to the best of your ability.

6... God won't ask how many friends you had,
He'll ask how many people to whom you were a friend.

7... God won't ask in what neighborhood you lived,
He'll ask how you treated your neighbors.

8...God won't ask about the color of your skin,
He'll ask about the content of your character.

9...God won't ask how many times you prayed,
He'll ask how many times you prayed for others.

======================================

 Saturday, July 15, 2006

In the year 429 B.C, there was a great plague in Greece that nearly killed 2/3 of the population. Enter a man called Hippocrates, who was free from superstition and believed that diseases came from nature as opposed to Gods. He even stated that epilepsy was caused from a blockage in the brain. He was the first physician to actually examine his patients.

When the plague broke out he recommended that people burn their clothes and boil the water before they drank it. It was to take over 2000 years before this was rediscovered. 

Hippocrates is considered the father of Medicine. The Hippocratic Oath that Doctors take is believed to be written by him.  Whether now doctors follow the Hippocratic Oath or the hypocrisy oath is a different matter altogether and I am not going to dwell on that.

One Smart soul has written a Hippocratic Oath for Software engineers which is quite hilarious. They are.

  • Never write a line of code that someone else can understand.
  • Make the simplest line of code appear complex. Use long counter intuitive names. Don't ever code "a=b", rather do something like: AlphaNodeSemaphore=*(int)(&(unsigned long)(BetaFrameNodeFarm));
  • Never use direct references to anything ever. Bury everything in macros. Bury the macros in include files. Reference those include files indirectly from other include files. Use macros to reference those include files.
  • Never code a function to return a value. All functions must return a pointer to a structure which contains a pointer to a value.
  • Load all sentences either written or spoken with alphabet soup. When someone asks you out to lunch, reply: "I can't because I've almost got my RISC-based OSI/TCP/IP client connected by BIBUS VMS VAX using SMTP over TCP sending SNMP inquiry results to be encapsulated in UDP packets for transmission to a SUN 4/280 NFS 4.3 BSD with release 3.6 of RPC/XDR supporting our ONC effort working."
  • Never complete a project on time. If you do, they will think it was easy and anyone can do it and they don't need you.

Here’s the complete list. Are you willing to take the oath? I have taken the Oath and promised to abide by the rules.J  

 Thursday, July 13, 2006

Once upon a time, a monk wearing the ochre robe chanced to enter a village full of atheists; he fell in with a gang of defiant youth who challenged him, to show them that the God whom he was adoring, actually existed. He said, he can; but before doing so, he asked for a cup of milk.

When the milk was placed before him, he did not drink it; but, sat, looking at it, long and silently, with increasing curiosity. The youth became impatient; their clamour became insistent.

The monk told them, "Wait a minute, I am told that there is butter in milk; but, I must say, this cup does not have it, for, I do not see any of it, however hard I look into it!"

The fellows laughed at his innocence and said, "Silly man! Don't rush into such absurd conclusions. Milk has butter in every drop; that is what makes it so nourishing. If you must see it as a separate concrete entity, you have to boil the milk, cool it, add sour curd, wait for some hours for it to curdle, then, churn it, and roll the butter that floats into a ball."

"Ah," said the monk, "that makes my task of showing you God much easier! God is in every thing, being, atom of the universe; it is because of this that they exist, and we can recognise them and enjoy them. To see Him as a concrete entity, you have to follow a prescribed procedure, earnestly, strictly and sincerely. Then, at the end of it all, you can experience His grace and His glory."

 Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Untagging myself with this picture tag. Well. This was easy since I don't have to say anything. Here we go.

Desired Celebrity.

None other than the great great great thalaivar....

Want to do this some day.

I would love to be in this seat (cockpit of an F-16)...


A place I would want to Visit.

Stay in one of the islands where the International Date Line crosses..

So that I can do this...

Random Favourites.

This kid..

and my pal..

I was tagged by Sathya. I am supposed to put the screen shot of her blog here but due to technical constraints I am not able to do it. Sorry Sat..Ok..Now time for revenge. Whom should I tag? The first place goes to the great Arjuna. I know that he is busy and already has a tag pending but I can't help it. I have only few regular visitors. The second place goes to Subha. She must be having a tough time replying to the comments in her posts but she has to pay for visiting my blog. The third is Ganesh Ram. He is hibernating now. This would be a good way to start his routine back.

So I rag...err..tag.. Arjuna, Subha and Ganesh..

 Monday, July 10, 2006

La Semaine du français roughly translates to "The French Week". It all started with this

Amelie Mauresmo, from France, won her first Wimbledon title after being down in the first set. Then followed this

Sylvain Calzati, from France, won the 8th stage (181 kms) of the tour de France and won the yellow jersey. This is his first win in the tour de France. Sylvain Calzati become a hero from zero.

Then the big one.

The great Zidane who would have been placed along with Maradona, Pele after his retirement did the unthinkable. The magician became a zero from hero. It takes great effort to reach to the top but one stupid mistake will bring us back down. What a lesson this man has taught us.

And what a week the French must have had!

 Thursday, July 06, 2006

நாரதர் : "நாராயண! நாராயண!"

Master : "வாருங்கள் நாரதரே. What's up? தங்கள் முகம் மிகவும் சோர்வாக உள்ளதே?"

நாரதர் : "அது ஓன்றுமில்லெ பிரபு. இரவு முழவதும் விழித்திருந்து football match பார்த்ததால் மிகவும் களைப்பாக உள்ளது."

Master : "ஓ அப்படியா! Match நிலமை தற்போது எவ்வாறு உள்ளது?"

நாரதர் : "மகா பிரபு. தாங்கள் அறியாததா? நேற்று status-meeting ல் நடந்ததை எனது நன்பர்கள் கூறி விட்டார்கள்."

Master : "Italy-Germany Semi-final's match பார்த்தாய் அல்லவா. அதிலிருந்து என்ன புரிந்து கொன்டாய், நாரதா?"

நாரதர் : "பார்த்தேன் பிரபு.ஓன்று மட்டும் நன்றாக புரிந்தது. கடைசி நிமிடத்தில் மட்டும் Penalty Corner தர கூடாது என்று."

Master : "அது இல்லை நாரதரே. அந்த match நமக்கு அலிக்கும் வாழ்க்கை தத்துவத்தை புரிந்து கொண்டாயா என்று கேட்கிறேன்?"

நாரதர் : "அதில் என்ன தத்துவம் உள்ளது, பிரபு?"

Master : "சொல்கிறேன் கேள். முதலில் யார் பந்தை அடிக்கிறார்கள் என்பது முக்கியம் இல்லை. கடைசியில் யார் பந்தை அடித்து Goal-லை முதலில் போடுகிறார்கள் என்பது தான் முக்கியம்."

நாரதர் : "ஆஹா. என்ன தத்துவம்! என்ன தத்துவம் ! பூலோகத்தில் மக்கள் அனைவரும் Brazil,Argentina,England, Germany போன்ற ஜாம்பவான்கள் finals-க்கு வருவார்கள் என்று எதிர்பார்த்துக் கொன்டு இருக்கும் போது அவர்கள் அனைவரையும் தோற்கடித்து இப்படி ஏமாற்றி விட்டீர்களே பிரபு."

Master : "நான் ஓன்றும் செய்யவில்லை நாரதா. நன்றாக விளையாடியவர்கள் final-s வரை வந்து விட்டார்கள்."

நாரதர் : "சரி போகட்டும் பிரபு. தற்சமயம் என்னை பூலோகத்தில் யாரும் கன்டு கௌள்வதே இல்லை. ஓரு Cinema படம் கூட என்னை வைத்து எடுப்பதில்லை. Final's-ல் யார் உலக கோப்பை வெல்லுவார்கள் என்று கூருங்கள். நான் ஏதாவது Betting-getting செய்து பிழைத்து கொல்கிறேன். தயவு செய்து அதை மட்டும் கூறும் பிரபு."

Master : "நாரதா. பொறுத்திருந்து பார். யார் உலக கோப்பையை வெல்வார்கள் என்று நான் சொல்ல மாட்டேன். அது மட்டும் ரகசியம்."

 Wednesday, July 05, 2006

தமிழ் text சரியாக ரெண்டர் ஆகிறதா என்ரு ஓரூ test. Problem இருந்தால் தயவு செய்து சொல்லவும்.

 Sunday, July 02, 2006

There was lot of commotion in the meeting room. Everyone had gathered for the regular weekly status meeting and was eagerly waiting for the Master. A few minutes later the Master entered the room, strode to the end and took his customary seat. Everyone bowed to the master and took their respective seats. After exchanging a few pleasantries the Master spoke.

Dear Angels. My blessings to all of you. I am sorry for keeping you all waiting. Let’s not waste any more time. How was last week?"

 

The Chief of the angels responsible for the galaxy “Paal Corridor” stood and read his report. “Dear Lord. My humble pranams. With your blessings everything in galaxy “Paal Corridor” is good. Everyone is happy.”

 

The Master was pleased to hear this.

 

Next the chief of galaxy “Chocolaty Path” read his report. The master was pleased with his report as well since everything was good in "Chocolaty Path".

 

Every chief took their turns and presented the report to the Master. Finally the chief of “Milky way” galaxy stood to read his report.

 

Dear Lord. My pranams. Last week there were 1,27,36,43,790 births and 87,95,743 deaths. There were 4 new life forms. Everything is good in milky way except….”

 

Except what? Go on..Don't hesitate.

 

Dear Lord. As you might know, Last week there was unusual number of requests coming in from the humans from the planet Earth. There were around 80 million people praying that Germany should win the soccer match. At the same time 30 million people were praying that Argentina should win the match. The trend even continued the next day. 50 million requests for an England victory and 10 million for Portugal. How did you manage that?”

 

Dear Angel. I am not biased and I do not show any favoritism towards any team.” He continued

 

Soccer is a game invented by humans. The players and audience should enjoy the game and not be bothered about the result. The same team which wins this time might lose the next time. These games only make a player strong. Even life is similar to the game. They should be enjoying the game and should not worry about the result. In real life humans make mistakes, there will be foul play and they will be pushed to corners, they will have to pay for the penalties, they will be substituted but the play has to go on and the aim should be towards the goal. The best team and the better players will definetely win.”

 

 

OK. Now tell me what happened after the game?”

 

"Dear Lord. Many of them from the losing team felt that you have cheated them. Some of them have started arguing that there is no God."

 

The Lord was not surprised. “What happened to people from the winning team? Did they thank me for responding to their prayers?”

 

Dear Lord. That’s the sad story. Only the few regulars thanked you.

 

When something goes wrong, Humans always blame God but when everything goes fine they think it was done only by their effort. They forget me. It’s not easy being God. It’s a thankless job. Anyway next week it’s going to be very busy with the semi finals and final match. So be prepared to handle the requests”.

 

The master stood up signaling the end of the meeting and walked away with his usual grace.